family values

Today I want to talk about family values here and in Germany. It is a well-known fact that today the rate of childless families in Germany is increasing and the average is 1.37 children per woman. This is the lowest rate in Europe and not even enough to keep the German population stable.
Check out
http://www.guardian.co.uk/germany/article/0,,1695850,00.html
and find out more about why Germany has the highest rate of childless women in the world.
I always thought this was kind of interesting, considering how many family benefits are available in Germany. Check out:
http://www.tatsachen-ueber-deutschland.de/707.0.html
you would think that many families would be more tempted to have children and not have ot worry about the financial aspect. This has to do with somethign else though. Women are more independent and seem to be less interested in being tight down and reliyng on a man for income. I feel that in the states so many women in their early 20s all they talk about is getting married and having children( like many of my friends and class mates)....and settling down and mainly..."oh, I wish I had a huge, fat diamond on my finger..."
I know I probably shouldn't be the one to speak, since I got married at age 19 (...yeah...I know that's young) but it is so odd to me. I don't know anybody from home (germany) who is married and/or has kids at my age not even people that are 5 or 10 years older than me. It seems that even if people settle down in Germany they wait until their late 20's or early 30's...and before they get married they would probably live together for at least 5 years or so to see if they can even get a long (and I think this is a VERY good idea...) And even people that decide to have kids that have lived together for maybe 10 years will not nessecatily get married...my mom didnt get married until I was about 16 and my brother was about 11...They had probably been dating for 15 years or so. My parents weren't married when I was born ( but then again my parents were kinda Hippies :) hehe) Also, so many girls here seem to think that the status of being "married" or being "engaged" and showing of that rock is the coolest thing...in germany I dont think people even really propose...you decide you get married and usually the man AND the woman will just wear a simple wedding band (sorry girls..no flashy bling bling) also instead of a ring, for which you could have bought your first house...(sorry....I just think it is kind of ridicoulus)..I mean yeah it was romantic when my husband proposed, and yeah my ring is pretty...
but: could i have done without it?! YES!
would I be any less happy!?? NO
I remember when I went back to germany after we got engaged people could simply not believe this and they all said" Oh, your ring is so typical american :)"
And for one I know that the religious aspect has a lot to do with the not moving in until your married and not having kids util your married, but also I think just the mentality is alot different here than it is in Germany....
Back to the low rate of families with children in Europe...I am really not sure why this number is so high, it could have to do with women waiting about 5-10 years longer to have children compared to the US, but I seriously think it has to do with the approach to sex ed here....When I came here I couldn't and still can't believe how many of my friends who are in serious relationships are not on the pill...and dont even use condoms...oh no,....we can use the "pull-out"method..."I'd rather do that than ask my mom if I can have the pill...or go to a pharmacy and get condoms"..."THAT WOULD BE SO EMBARASSING"...or: "I DONT WANT MY PARENTS TO KNOW THAT IM HAVING SEX"...well...dont you think that if you get pregnant from some drunk dude at some party that they will figure it out...I mean, isn't it sad that kids would rather do that than talk to their parents about getting the pill...and again there are many other aspects that play into this...I know a lot of parents like to live in denial...well, you can teach abstinence as much as you want...kids will still do what they want to do...and if they dont want to have sex...great, but if they do, wouldnt you rather have them be comfortable enough with talking to their own parents about it than getting pregnant at age 19.....another factor is the cost. I have been on the pill for nearly 8 or 9 years, the reason why I got on it when I was so young was simply that I was always really sick...the nice thing is that in Germany,since we have health insurance that covers E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G ( i know this is VERY VERY different here in the States, as I have come to find) it doesnt cost anything until you turn 18 and after that it cost me 5$ for a three months supply...here it costs me about 10 times that much...(and thats a reduced price for low-income families...) but when I wanted to get on it, I just went up to my mom and it is the most normal thing in the world...and thats how it is in europe...I mean come on people, be realistic...
Anyway...there is much more to this topic, and I know i sound really opinionated and a lot of people will probably send me hate mail after reading this, but I am simply giving my opinion, based on my own experiences and observations...and hey, if America stands for one thing it is "FREEDOM OF SPEECH", RIGHT...there is always the first Amendment...